Stop Hating Teens, and Start Respecting Them
…or you’ll have me to deal with!
Recently I ran across a profoundly disturbing piece of science journalism regarding new observations of the teenaged brain. Read it, then come back here.
What offends me, exactly? The part that no one notices – the part that people of the modern culture, especially (as far as I know) here in the USA, perpetuate without thought: the totally biased “scientific” interpretation (but perfectly accurate in terms of our cultural myths) on top of the actual observation of the teenage brain; though Teen brains may indeed not possess myelin sheaths that adults brains have, that doesn’t make them “unfinished”, in the sense that the article portrays: foolish, flawed, poor decision makers.
Without Teen’s “unfinished” brains 99% of the risk taking done in the name of love, art, idealism, adventure, protecting family, would disappear.
Teens excel at taking risks because they have perfectly developed brains for doing so.
Saying they have unfinished brains compares to saying a new moon hasn’t “finished” until it swells to a full moon. The Teen brain marks one moment in the cycle of the brains life where it has enormous potential for one kind of behavior – risk taking, adventure, romantic expression.
Think about this. Every moment of a human body’s life, the forces of life have demanded they produce vitality and excellence for all the humans in the social group. As natural people, belonging to family and land, we don’t “tolerate” the “slow development” of the teenage brain. We require teenagers to have fully intelligent minds, with just a little bit of crazy, to test the boundaries of our culture – to take risks, act like fools for love, to do everything that sober adults can’t do (without taking a deep breath).
It adds an extra layer to note that adults of the modern world (who belong to the culture of the above article) simultaneously want to consume teens (sexual exploitation, pop entertainment, using them to fuel our wars) along with demonizing, judging (like the neuroscientist in the article) and controlling them (oppressive schooling environments, curfews, etc.).
There would be no war in the world if it wasn’t for the teenage brain; and yet who runs those wars? Old men, adults. I don’t see the article explaining that part…
It’s awfully convenient to pin foolish behaviors on teens.
Every stage of a single person’s life creates Life for everyone around them, if they live it fully.
Children excel at Play, Teens excel at Risk, Adults excel at Providing, Elders excel at Story. The cycle never stops, it has no real beginning or endpoint. Without any one of these ripenings of human aspect, we would have never survived to the present. We would not exist. We require children, teens, adults, and elders to behave as they do for our very survival and vitality.
For those adults who look at children and see the inconvenience of playfulness, look at teens and feel threatened by their risky behavior, or look at elders and the ‘tiresomeness’ of their stories, I can only look at you and say:
Consider that if you haven’t done those things to your fullest ability, in your own time, then you haven’t lived.
Just because we live in a culture that worships gods of productivity and production, does not make such worship sane. To the extent that I did not play enough, or risk enough, I regret it. It has made me a smaller person.
Without a doubt, I do intend to make the most of my adult and elderhood. I only have the present moment to create the wealth of a well-lived life.
March 4th, 2010 at 7:36 pm
Nice. Thanks. This was exactly what I wanted.
March 4th, 2010 at 9:38 pm
As a teen, I’ve dealt with the dismissive attitude of “oh, your brain isn’t fully developed yet, you can’t possibly make ‘good’ decisions” WAY more than I’d like! Thank you for this. It’s by far my favorite take on this subject that I’ve seen!!
March 4th, 2010 at 9:46 pm
Thanks Idzie. I really appreciate that. You’re sincerely welcome.
March 4th, 2010 at 10:36 pm
I had the exact same response when I heard that story on the radio. Thing is, this is also bullshit science. Are the neurons in your forebrain fully myelinated on your 18th birthday? No, of course not! They reach a peak around middle age, and then they start to decline. But do they call 20-year-olds, 30-year-oids or 40–year-olds “unfinished”? No, of course not. Otherwise, we’d have to define a functional adult as only one, undetectable moment in life.
What the science ACTUALLY says is much more important, and much more interesting–which is why this hack piece completely ignored it. Myelination encodes your experience. It’s the ways paths are set down in your brain, the same way a deer moving through the forest leaves a game trail, which opens up more when you follow it, which might become a trail if enough people follow it often enough, and might close back up and disappear if people don’t use it. It says that each day, we’re creating our brains in exactly the same way we create the world around us. It tells us that no one, none of us, are ever “finished.” Not even when we’re dead.
March 4th, 2010 at 10:49 pm
Thanks Jason for filling in the blanks! And a beautiful image.
As for the article, anymore, the combination of both ignorance AND arrogance just chaps my hide. I really struggle to stay centered around it.
March 4th, 2010 at 11:47 pm
My 8.5 and 5.75 year old are very capable of making choices and decisions in their life. They get lots of freedom to test different options, and have parents willing to offer advice and guidance when they ask for it or need it. They also aren’t in school each day, subject to rules. Our family life is guided by the principles of safety and happiness for all, and we often discuss choices within that framework.
I think a better assessment would be that teens can be adept decision makers, willing to take risks for their beliefs and goals – *if* they have been given the chance to make lots of choices, throughout life, and know they can trust the adults around them to offer advice and guidance – or a safety net, should things not go according to plan.
Of course, if the adults have set up an adversarial relationship – why then would any teen want to go to these people for help? That really would be a poor decision, no?
I love your writing, Idzie. I don’t know how anyone could read your well considered essays and still think adolescents lack insight. =)
March 5th, 2010 at 10:17 am
[...] friend Willem Larson has written a couple pieces that I could not agree with more: Stop Hating Teens and Start Respecting Them, and Widening Conversational Scope: Identity. And if you haven’t seen it yet, Willem is [...]
March 6th, 2010 at 12:07 am
Excellent. Perfect, great. This is all so true; it takes a particularly brave version of an adult (in the current society) to support teens in their wildness; well written, good on ya!!
March 6th, 2010 at 11:29 am
Oh my God. Willem, thank you SO much for this article. As a parent, it’s the best thing I could have heard right now as I gaze out with my mind’s eye across the mist-shrouded landscape of my daughter’s future life.
Unfortunately it’s also the WORST thing to hear as an adult with his teen and “risk-taking years” behind him. When I read your punchline, I wept, seriously. I feel those years are squandered forever, that I truly “haven’t lived.” Jason’s words are a comfort, though–the knowledge that the brain NEVER “finishes” developing that way, as well as the friendship of folks at a similar stage of existence (like you!) gives me hope that I’ll be able to fully claim my present moment for the fullest life possible.
Whew. What an emotional wringer! But a necessary one, I think. I think I’ll have to blog it myself.
Thanks once again for kicking off the crust of lies and letting life shine through.
Peace,
-Joel
March 6th, 2010 at 1:22 pm
[...] elder, humanity, Jason Godesky, maturity, myth, Mythic Cartography, neuroscience, NPR, teen My friend Willem wrote an article about the profound disrespect for adolescence imbedded in our culture. He takes a piece of NPR [...]
March 6th, 2010 at 3:02 pm
This remembers me of the people that to this day engage in the process of creating the world. This remembers me of the ever-latering day. This remembers me of life always being a verb. Willem my western mind wants to praise you ! but my wild side wants to say: Sure, you’re being so obvious!!!!
thanks
March 6th, 2010 at 10:33 pm
Seems trifling to note this, but since I heard you say this before and absorbed its more profound meanings then, reading it this time made me think of games. When Chronica Feudalis came out, some of the indie kids started musing about historically-accurate medieval games. Zac D. had some ideas about using the “three orders” of medieval society. As Bishop Adalbero of Laon put it, “Here below, some pray, others fight, still others work.” Zac proposed that you make a character who explicitly belongs to one of these orders. If you make a knight, you automatically win in a fight against a cleric or a peasant. If you make a cleric, you automatically win spiritual or intellectual conflicts with knights or peasants. If you’re a peasant, you automatically win conflicts involving physical labor against clerics or knights.
Your statement made me think if the Fifth World should do something like that, honoring age instead of such an absurd “caste” system. You can play a Child, an Adolescent, an Adult, or an Elder. As a Child, you’ll always beat an Adolescent, an Adult, or an Elder at playing. As an Adolescent, you’ll always beat a Child, an Adult, or an Elder at risking. As an Adult, you’ll always beat a Child, an Adolescent, or an Elder at providing, and as an Elder, you’ll always beat a Child, an Adolescent, or an Adult at sharing stories. And naturally, a healthy society needs them all. It gets interesting when you get to the question of which one you need right here.
March 24th, 2010 at 3:14 am
hello Willem. Teens are so different. I cant understand everything. Im behind a inner world. Where teens are dangour. Its part of life circle that to feel fear, when we get to close to someone. Or in situation where we get hurt often. People out of society context, as an experiement or just by a life situation. Dont understand.
Who can we have make trust to each other, being nice and gentle. or in fighting with kind of looking for each.
Its too easy too do it easy. alot of peoples dont get help a simple rants or textes. Or just comit out of helplessness. I like your work. I follow it since few years. You lost ure teen spirit a bit man. Me too ithink. Its so intelligent yours game. I can learn something…I wish a form of clear instruction. Orconsise. One word or one sentence of meaning.
Do you can take my feedback, my opinion?
March 27th, 2010 at 12:39 pm
great article – as a mother of two teenagers it really pisses me off when people close up their minds and dismiss all the awesome of teenagers!
March 27th, 2010 at 5:27 pm
[...] I came across this link on I’m Unschooled, Yes I Can Write. It quotes another blog post at The College of Mythic Cartography. Something I have heard oh so many times is that, because as teenagers and young adults our brains [...]
April 15th, 2010 at 4:06 pm
Surprise, surprise—NPR did a much better job on the middle-aged. Isn’t it interesting that teenage brains “aren’t fully connected,” but middle-aged brains “can see the big picture”?